Artist's statement:

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Have you ever felt as if you are in a cage? Your actions and opportunities are limited, and not by your will. You can adapt to this mode of living - or you can die. This is what occupation feels like. This is the moment when you start to reevaluate ordinary things, which our lives used to be filled with.

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When the invaders started to establish their own rules in Kherson, they introduced a curfew. At six in the evening, there were no people on the streets. Closer to 8 pm, you cannot go out at all. Russians captured everyone they saw on the streets "to find out the circumstances." 

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I rarely left my neighborhood to go to the city center. However, one day I decided to meet my friend, whom I haven't seen for a long time, in the center. Looking at the Dnipro from our Kherson embankment, we couldn't believe that our reality had become so unreal. Time flew by. When I looked at the watch, it was already 7 pm. Home is far away, public transport is no longer working. I stood at the bus stop for a long time, hoping for the last bus, but it never appeared on the horizon. There were several cars near the bus stop, the drivers asked for crazy money, but I had no other choice. I arrived home unharmed, but my husband was already thinking about which Russian torture chamber he should go to look for me... 

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 In the occupied Kherson, an ordinary person like me had a simple dream about a simple night walk - when you just walk and enjoy the dark depth of the night, the moon and stars in the sky. You don't think about what time you need to be at home to avoid being taken "to the basement."* When you are not afraid to walk the streets, because it is normal, because you are at home...

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When I left the occupation after 7 months, fate brought me to a new city - Tartu, Estonia. On our first night there, we walked the streets, and I tried to understand my feelings. On one hand, it was the freedom I was longing for. The ability to just go outside, to walk without fear of anything, it felt amazing. On the other hand, there was still fear inside of me. It took a long time to rebuild the psyche to adapt to normal life. But the stars in the sky still shine differently for me - yes, as if the shadow of the past is creeping into their light. 

 

*a neologism meaning “to be captured by invaders and taken to a torture chamber”

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